Nothing But Balls
Sports From a Different Perspective…

Seattle Stupor Sonics

The Seattle Super Sonics finished 15th in their conference which culminated in a series of Ping Pong balls that would decide whether or not their season was a success or not. College Basketball provided two superstars to add their names to the NBA payroll. Both Center Greg Oden and Swing Forward Kevin Durant have special traits to offer. Oden, being over seven feet tall and already a defensive force is a rare commodity. This is compared to Durant’s amazing athleticism and flare for the game, which coupled with his 6’9″ frame,  makes for something truly novel. The goal for the Sonics and the other 13 pathetic teams that could not make the NBA playoffs, an event easier to qualify for than the Special Olympics, was to get one of the top picks. Fortunately for Seattle, they got the second pick which turned into Durant.

Everythng started right for the Sonics and they even added two quality players in the draft in Power Forwards Carl Landry of Purdue and Glenn “Big Baby” Davis of LSU. Landry is one of the deep sleepers in the draft this year and he will ink with Seattle. Davis could have been a lottery pick last year, but due to a subpar year his stock fell considerably. Both, definitely could be solid pros and, when Durant falls in your lap, you won. From here, the wheels begin to fall off.

Then, they lost their two best players. One in the form of a trade and one in the form of free agency. Ray Allen along with Davis was traded to another bastion of futility, Boston, for marginal players Delonte West and Wally Szsczerbiak, as well as the rights to number five pick overall Jeff Green of Georgetown. Allen scored 26.4 points per game as well 4.5 rebounds and 4 dimes. This trade is justified in the undeniable fact of age and the sweet shooting guard is not getting any younger. West and Szczerbiak  scored in double figures per game and are decent players, but they cannot fill the void caused by Allen’s departure. So, the main focus of the trade must be getting Green, a forward who only scored 12 points a game in college and four boards. None of these players can adaquettely replace Allen and his smooth stroke; so most definitely they would do everything they can to keep their second leading scorer.

Rashard Lewis is probably the best player you never heard of in the NBA. The guy just puts up twenty every night. His contract is up, making him a free agent. And even though his current team got the first meeting with the star forward, they could not close the deal on keeping their second leading scorer to compliment Durant, creating quite a formidable force. With Durant and Lewis at 2 and 3, coupled with serviceable point guard Luke Ridnour, and forwards Green, Nick Collison, and Chris Wilcox, the Sonic would have a more than solid shot at making the playoffs next year. However, maybe their goal is to rest the team’s hopes on ping pong balls again. This appears to be the case being that Lewis has agreed verbally to a deal with the Magic.

The addition of Durant and the departures of two top scorers does not equal out by itself, but wait there is more. Now it is reported that the Sonics will name Spurs top assisstant P.J. Carlesimo to be the next coach. Sure the coaching market is a little bit thin right now but picking a guy  with a career NBA win percentage of .452 seems a tad silly. Why don’t they pick some other former college coach retread? They could probably get Jan Van Breda Koff  or Tim Floyd. Actually, if they are willing to go that low, the sonics may be better off buying a cardboard cutout of Red Auerbach to put in the coaches box. At least no negatives would come from it.

The Sonics front office must be in some kind of Stupor if they think that these moves help their chances of making the playoffs or beyond. Hiring Carlesimo, trading Allen and not retaining Lewis all seem to point in one direction. Unfortunately, that direction is unknown because, who knows how the ping pong ball will bounce?

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One Response to “Seattle Stupor Sonics”

  1. Do you know where I can get jhl cologne?


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